Lies Nigeria Men Tell

In my years of dating I have come to realize that some men have PHD in lying. Oh my good Jesus, it is in their DNA!

Most times men lie but they also have their reasons for lying to us. Now it’s only natural to feel terrible when you just discovered the man you love has lied to you. It hurts. It throws you off balance. It makes you angry. It messes with your emotions and makes you question your own self-worth.

I remember how the first guy I dated lied to me about a particular girl I always see him with, he told me she was his sister and I believed. Until his younger sister revealed to me that she wasn’t his sister but his girlfriend and he had asked them to also play along but because they love me, they had to tell me the truth. That experience killed me sha.

I had to go back to my bible to read about the creation of man and how lie originated. From creation, lies originated from the serpent that tempted Eve in the Garden of Eden to eat the forbidden fruit. Who was the serpent? Was it a man or a woman that used the body of the ''beast of the field'' to tempt Eve? According to the free dictionary;

serpent

(ˈsɜr pənt)

1. a snake.

2. a wily, treacherous, or malicious person.

3. the Devil; Satan. Gen. 3:1–5.

4. an obsolete wooden wind instrument with a serpentine shape and a deep tone.

I took my time to analyze this definition and i have come to a conclusion that the serpent is indeed a man. Only a man has the skills to deceive a woman like Eve and make her fall. He couldn’t try it with Adam because he knew Adam would have been able to detect his lying game and when he saw a ‘’weaker vessel’’ as they say, he quickly took advantage of  it. Also we have been made to understand that the devil is a man and according to the definition above, a serpent is a devil/satan, so does this solidifies my conclusion?. Lets see how the serpent tempted Eve in Genesis 3:1-7 says;

 Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”

 The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,  but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’”

“You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman.  “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. 

Oh what a lie!!! We see men nowadays who are even worse than the serpent. Only a man who knows God can be bold enough to say the truth. I didn't say a religious man because the men we see in churches nowadays ehnnn, make i no too talk.

I saw this article written by Nkem Ndem, a dynamic freelance writer and editor and i find it very relatable. I know we still have few good men out there, but the ‘’serpents’’ are just too plenty roaming the streets deceiving Eves out there. She listed 5 lies men tell.

1-  I’m single
There is nothing worse than being made a mistress or side chick and you don’t even know it. You meet a guy and he tells you he is single but two months later, you wake up to find your

self tagged on his wedding picture posts on Instagram; or worse, you get a call from an angry fiancée or wife threatening to pour acid on you if you don’t leave her man. 

Recently I met this guy, I had known him for a long time but we weren’t in good talking terms but out of the blues we started talking, all thanks to social media. We met and immediately we clicked, I liked him and thought he was the one. I spoke to few people about him and they told me he has a girlfriend, I confronted him but he just brushed it off saying ‘’How people take know my matter?’’

Well, because we were spending time together and I haven’t heard or seen him pick any strange calls, I believed it’s possible he didn’t have a girlfriend. Then one day the gist came out and voila, he was actually in a relationship. How he managed to keep it secret and still hang out with me on a daily basis is still very hard for me to comprehend. I confronted him and the usual talk now ‘’ I really like you, if I didn’t have a girlfriend I would have dated you’’. I kept on asking myself why he didn’t tell me from the beginning that he was in a relationship. Why lead me on?

2- I wasn’t checking her out
While some Nigerian guys have perfected the art of looking covertly, there are some that just cannot hold themselves, their eyes bulge out and stay glued to any hot chick in their vicinity. A guy checking out or ogling another girl while he is with you does not necessarily mean he does not appreciate you, he thinks the other girl is prettier or he wants to dump you and go after the girl; it just means he does not respect you enough to save you the hurt or embarrassment. 

One time i was on a date with a guy and while we were gisting a lady walked into the restaurant all sexily dressed and i swear this guy was literally undressing her with his eyes. Then i had to call his name and he acted like nothing happened. I jokingly said ''na waooo, you don undress this girl finish'' and his response was ''which girl, where is she?''. 

3- I don’t know who she is /why she keeps calling me
This is a classic line every Nigerian player gives when he wants to avoid being caught…but do you even need to consider it? Obviously, he gave this desperate girl his number, otherwise how else would she have it… especially if it is his personal number and he is not a celebrity? Again, he most certainly did not tell her that he is in a relationship as why else would she feel so comfortable calling him at any hour of the day, even calling back when he does not pick the first time? Bottom line: He knows the girl, and this girl keeps calling him because he is leading her on! In fact, chances are he is cheating on you or attempting to cheat on you. Either way, you may want to get to the root of the matter. To cut out suspicion – which is a huge destroyer in relationships, ask him to respond to the call while with you, engaging her in a conversation while on speaker phone. Also, ask him to tell the girl he has a girlfriend he is in love with and is not interested in her. This sounds silly, but it most usually reveals the truth. If he starts with the “you don’t trust me” line, Nne, pack your load and go.

I tell you, i have been a victim of this and at the end of the day i got to find out that he was dating the girl also.

4- Gosh, I left my wallet
I believe this lie should be embarrassing, but it is amazing how often full-grown Nigerian men use it on girls. A guy wants to impress a girl, but he cannot afford to, so he tries to play smart by saying he left his wallet, that way the girl pays to save them the embarrassment of being tackled by the restaurant management. In my opinion, the guys that tell this lie are weak guys that do not have a vision for their lives. They love to leech on others every opportunity they get. 

I went out on a date one certain time and all through the while we were talking he kept on saying how he has this land in Abuja, this car and how he has made a lot of investment. In my small mind, this guy get money. I ordered only water oh, but this dude kept on ordering for grilled fish (big one), long island and water to step down. When it was time to pay he presented an expired ATM. My goodness, i was ashamed and to avoid embarrassment, i had to pay. I don learn my lesson, next time ehnn, me and the man will embarrass ourselves together.

5- I would never lie to you
This is the award-winning lie. Some gullible girls actually believe their boyfriends when he tells them he would never lie to them. The truth is simple: EVERYONE lies for good reasons, bad reasons and everything else in between. It is part of what makes us human. If he can lie about the food he ate or where he ate it, who that private call was from or even how old he is, then he will not hesitate to lie about huge things like getting a girl pregnant, being HIV positive, living a double life or even his parents not liking you. A serious guy would rather say: I try my best to make sure I do not lie to you.

Have you been told any of these lies?